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Last week, we considered the notion of “certainty” as presented in the Oscar-nominated film Conclave. We saw a homily given by a fictional Roman Catholic Cardinal who asserted that holding to certainty is problematic, and that abandoning it can bring us to tolerance and unity. And in our practice, we’re taught that “uncertainty” is among the foundational principles of Buddhism.
This week, I’ve found myself inquiring further into the notions of certainty and uncertainty as I observe the march of current events. “Good grief! What to do in the present circumstance? Is there anything?” The questions have got ahold of me, and they won’t let go. In the service of this inquiry, I found myself drawn back to a noted roshi’s writing about “not-knowing,” specifically a chapter in James Ishmael Ford’s book If You’re Lucky, Your Heart Will Break: Field Notes from a Zen Life (Wisdom Publications, 2012).
And then I remembered a Thursday talk from last year that dealt with that very subject, uncertainty, not-knowing. Strangely enough, that talk was based on that very chapter in Ford’s book. Here are some pertinent excerpts from the 2024 talk, “Not Knowing Is Most Intimate.”
I’d just read the chapter in which Ford shares his experience of not knowing, titled “Only Don’t Know,” which is how the Korean Master Seung Sahn puts the Zen maxim, “I don’t know.” Some of you may be familiar with this fundamental teaching of Zen. To answer a question with the phrase, “I don’t know,” is a profound response in Zen practice. In this chapter, Ford Roshi quotes Case 20 of the Book of Equanimity, the Shoyoroku. In our translation, the koan reads something like this:
Jizo asked Hogen, “Where are you going, senior monk?” Hogen said, “I am on pilgrimage, wandering with the wind.” Jizo said, “What are you on pilgrimage for?” Hogen said, “I don’t know.” Jizo said, “Non-knowing is most intimate.”
As I re-read that koan, Shoyoroku Case 20, it occurred to me that the master’s question about the point of the pilgrimage aligns quite closely with the contemporary saying about the journey and the destination. People are always reminding us that it’s not the destination that’s important, it’s the journey. And not knowing the destination kind of aligns with the notion of uncertainty, doesn’t it? We just put “I don’t know” – uncertainty – in our spiritual pocket and go where our feet lead us. Do what we are called to do in the moment.
Now, I’m not sure that all of this carries much meaning in the present world circumstance. It surely doesn’t tell us what, if anything, we are to do in the face of current events. At best, it may serve to help us rest more surely in the “I don’t know” posture; it may help us accept the possibility that our best way is to just go with the flow of events and to live and act in accordance with our true nature. And as all religions teach, in one way or another, our true nature lives as love, manifested in peace and justice for all. A founding principle of this nation: Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
James Ford Roshi ends his “Only Don’t Know” chapter with these words of wisdom about the phrase, “Not knowing is most intimate.” He says that not-knowing (or non-knowing) leaves us …
Open, wide as the sky. And at the very same time, intimate, more intimate than any word can ever convey. And the way to this wisdom is simple.
Just don’t know.
Only don’t know.
That’s all it takes.
Open, wide as the sky. On the spiritual Way, however we define that Way, it’s the journey, not the destination, that counts. Let us look to the journey. Shoyoroku Case 20 puts the matter clearly:
Jizo said, “What are you on pilgrimage for?” Hogen said, “I don’t know.” Jizo said, “Non-knowing is most intimate.”
It’s the inquiry – the wondering, the wonderment, the willingness to put one foot in front of the other even when we’re not certain where we’re going – that keeps us connected to ourselves and to all beings. Intimate with all beings. And this intimacy keeps us going, alive to all possibility.
Thank you. And so, we practice.
EMPTY CLOUD ZEN 